{"id":757,"date":"2026-05-12T01:42:34","date_gmt":"2026-05-12T01:42:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/?p=757"},"modified":"2026-05-12T01:42:36","modified_gmt":"2026-05-12T01:42:36","slug":"6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/","title":{"rendered":"6 misconceptions adults have about children"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Adults have many misconceptions about children. One thing I have realized after many years of working with children and parents is this: adults often truly love children, but they do not always truly understand them.<br>We grew up in a time when emotions were often dismissed.\n\u201cWhat\u2019s there to cry about?\u201d<br>\u201cYou\u2019ll understand when you grow up.\u201d<br>\u201cIn the past, your parents didn\u2019t even have what you have now.\u201d<br>And gradually, many people carry the way they were raised into how they raise their own children. Not because parents don\u2019t love their children, but because no one ever taught us how to look into the inner world of a child.<br>Children do not only need to be well-fed, do well in school, and be obedient. They need to be understood. And there are things adults think are normal that are quietly leaving very long-lasting marks on a child\u2019s heart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_82_2 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Causes of Brain Rot<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewbox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewbox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseprofile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CTre_con_biet_gi_ma_buon%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cChildren don\u2019t know what it means to be sad.\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CTre_nho_thi_nho_gi_dau%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cLittle kids don\u2019t remember anything.\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CCon_im_lang_la_ngoan%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cA quiet child is a well-behaved child.\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CTre_tang_dong_la_hu%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cHyperactive children are just naughty.\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CSo_sanh_se_giup_tre_co_gang_hon%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cComparison will help children try harder.\u201d<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/2026\/05\/12\/6-dieu-nguoi-lon-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em\/#%E2%80%9CDay_con_la_sua_con%E2%80%9D\" >\u201cRaising a child means fixing a child.\u201d<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CTre_con_biet_gi_ma_buon%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cChildren don\u2019t know what it means to be sad.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>This is perhaps one of the most misunderstood things by adults. Adults often judge sadness based on the \u201cseverity\u201d of the situation. Losing a job is worth being sad about. Financial pressure is worth being sad about. A relationship breakup is worth being sad about.<br>What about children?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Not being played with by friends<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Being called out by the teacher<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Parents forgetting a promise<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Or breaking something they love<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"810\" height=\"540\" src=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/R-1.jpg\" alt=\"Kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 6 \u0111i\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn th\u01b0\u1eddng hi\u1ec3u l\u1ea7m v\u1ec1 tr\u1ebb em \" class=\"wp-image-911\" srcset=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/R-1.jpg 810w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/R-1-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/R-1-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/R-1-18x12.jpg 18w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 810px) 100vw, 810px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>In the eyes of adults, these are just small things. But a child\u2019s psychology doesn\u2019t work that way. A child has not yet had enough life experience to self-soothe like an adult. A child\u2019s brain, especially the emotional regulation areas, is still developing. This makes children\u2019s emotions often feel \u201cbigger\u201d than we think. Some parents have told me:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong><em>\u201cMy child is too sensitive.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But in reality, children are born sensitive. It\u2019s just that as we grow older, adults learn to hide their emotions more and more. What a child needs when they are sad is not:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong><em>We grew up in a time when emotions were often dismissed.\n\u201cWhat\u2019s there to cry about?\u201d<\/em><\/strong> Instead, it should be: \u201cMom knows that made you sad.\u201d <strong><em>\u201cM\u1eb9 bi\u1ebft chuy\u1ec7n \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0m con bu\u1ed3n.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When emotions are acknowledged, children learn how to understand themselves. Children who grow up in environments where their emotions are constantly dismissed often learn to silence themselves. They no longer know how to share sadness, tend to suppress emotions, or even explode emotionally as adults. Because from a young age, whenever they were hurt, what they heard most was: \u201cThere\u2019s nothing to cry about.\u201d Gradually, they start believing their feelings don\u2019t matter and must be hidden in order to be loved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CTre_nho_thi_nho_gi_dau%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cLittle kids don\u2019t remember anything.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Many adults think: \u201cThey\u2019re still small, they\u2019ll forget tomorrow anyway.\u201d<br>It\u2019s true that children may forget events, but feelings often stay for a very long time. A child mocked for giving a wrong answer may grow up with a fear of speaking in public. A child frequently compared to others may always feel \u201cnot good enough.\u201d And a child who is constantly shouted at may become unusually quiet or extremely reactive when older. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What\u2019s important is that many childhood wounds do not exist as clear memories, but as feelings: the feeling of not mattering, the feeling of always being wrong, the feeling of having to try very hard just to be loved. Some adults spend years healing because even though they don\u2019t clearly remember the events, they still carry a deep sense of being overlooked since childhood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Childhood wounds may fade from memory, but the emotional imprint often stays for a very long time. As adults, they may struggle with low self-confidence, fear of mistakes, people-pleasing tendencies, or a constant sense of inadequacy. Some carry the fear of being criticized or rejected for years, simply because when they were young, their emotions were dismissed as \u201cyou\u2019ll forget it anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CCon_im_lang_la_ngoan%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cA quiet child is a well-behaved child.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Many parents prefer children who don\u2019t argue, don\u2019t make noise, don\u2019t whine, and always obey. And yes, they are often praised as \u201cgood kids.\u201d But in child psychology, not all silence comes from peace. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Some children stay silent because they have learned that their emotions are not listened to, especially after repeatedly being told: \u201cStop crying,\u201d \u201cDon\u2019t be like that,\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re overreacting,\u201d \u201cIt\u2019s not that serious.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"900\" height=\"600\" src=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/tre-bo-chay-va-khong-chay-1-1604.jpg\" alt=\"Kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 6 \u0111i\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn th\u01b0\u1eddng hi\u1ec3u l\u1ea7m v\u1ec1 tr\u1ebb em \" class=\"wp-image-912\" srcset=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/tre-bo-chay-va-khong-chay-1-1604.jpg 900w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/tre-bo-chay-va-khong-chay-1-1604-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/tre-bo-chay-va-khong-chay-1-1604-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/tre-bo-chay-va-khong-chay-1-1604-18x12.jpg 18w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 900px) 100vw, 900px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Children gradually learn that expressing emotions is not safe and begin to withdraw. These children, as they grow up, often hide their feelings and needs, are afraid of bothering others, struggle to say \u201cno,\u201d and constantly try to endure things in order to be loved. On the outside, they may appear mature and understanding, but inside they are often lonely and unsure how to speak up for themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CTre_tang_dong_la_hu%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cHyperactive children are just naughty.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Some children cannot sit still for long. They love to run, constantly ask questions, and are curious about everything around them. In environments with many rules, these children are easily labeled as mischievous, disruptive, inattentive, or difficult to teach. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But what adults often forget is that curiosity is a natural part of a child\u2019s development, and a child who loves to explore is not a \u201cbad\u201d child. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I once met a boy who constantly took his toys apart just to see what was inside. The adults around him were exhausted and often scolded him for \u201cbreaking things.\u201d Yet a few years later, that same boy developed strong skills in assembly and technical thinking. Many of a child\u2019s abilities first appear in ways that adults find inconvenient. What children need is not only control, but guidance on how to channel their energy properly, without being labeled. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When a child is repeatedly called \u201cbad,\u201d \u201cdestructive,\u201d or \u201cdifficult,\u201d they begin to believe there is something wrong with them. This leads to low self-confidence, fear of expressing themselves, and constant worry about making mistakes. Some children withdraw, while others become more resistant because they feel misunderstood. Most sadly, many lose their natural curiosity and energy\u2014qualities that could have become their greatest strengths.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CSo_sanh_se_giup_tre_co_gang_hon%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cComparison will help children try harder.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cLook at that child.\u201d<br>\u201cWhy can others do it but you can\u2019t?\u201d<br>\u201cWhen I was your age\u2026\u201d<br>Many adults use comparison as motivation.<br>But for children, comparison often creates shame rather than effort. When constantly placed next to someone else, a child begins to think: <strong><em>\u201cMaybe I\u2019m not good enough.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><br>And the most dangerous part is this: children stop trying because they enjoy learning or growing. They try only to gain approval. Many adults today struggle with fear of failure, achievement pressure, and chronic feelings of inadequacy\u2014not because they are weak, but because from childhood, they were used to being measured against others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Children who grow up with constant comparison often struggle to feel \u201cgood enough.\u201d They tend to develop low self-esteem and evaluate their worth through achievements and external validation. As adults, many become afraid of failure, pressured to prove themselves, or endlessly compare themselves to others without ever feeling satisfied. And sometimes, comparison even leads to resentment toward the \u201cother child\u201d they were constantly measured against\u2014even though that person did nothing wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"%E2%80%9CDay_con_la_sua_con%E2%80%9D\"><\/span>\u201cRaising a child means fixing a child.\u201d<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Many adults unconsciously turn parenting into a constant process of correction: don\u2019t run, don\u2019t do that, don\u2019t say this, don\u2019t behave like that. We become so focused on \u201cfixing\u201d children that we forget they also need to be seen for their strengths. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" src=\"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/Shutterstock_2395880271-1536x864-1-1024x576.jpg\" alt=\"Kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 6 \u0111i\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn th\u01b0\u1eddng hi\u1ec3u l\u1ea7m v\u1ec1 tr\u1ebb em \" class=\"wp-image-910\" srcset=\"\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" data-srcset=\"\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>A child who is constantly hearing about their mistakes will grow up with the feeling: \u201cI am never good enough.\u201d Yet what helps a child develop in a healthy way the most is the feeling: \u201cEven though I am not perfect, I am still loved.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Education is not only about correcting behavior. Education is also about ensuring that a child does not lose their confidence and sense of self-worth while growing up. When parenting is misunderstood as \u201cfixing a child,\u201d the child gradually grows up believing that they are always wrong. Instead of being seen as a developing human being, they become \u201ca collection of errors that need to be corrected.\u201d This makes children lose confidence, fear making decisions, and constantly wait for others to judge whether they are right or wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Over time, these children often become adults who are very harsh with themselves. They tend to be perfectionists, constantly afraid of making mistakes, or on the contrary, they give up easily because they believe \u201cno matter how hard I try, it\u2019s never enough.\u201d Some will continuously seek external validation because they have never truly felt that they were \u201cokay\u201d as they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Conclusion<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>There is a sentence I really like:<br>\u201cEvery child is a good child.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But sometimes, adults are too busy teaching children to become the \u201cright child\u201d that they forget this. Children do not need perfect parents. They need adults who are willing to try to understand them a little more each day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because there are words that adults may forget in seconds, but a child can carry them throughout their entire childhood\u2014and grow up with emotional wounds and personality struggles that last into adulthood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was inspired to write about this topic after reading Totto-chan: The Little Girl at the Window. It is a beautiful book about children and education, written through the gentle flow of storytelling. The book gave me a deep sense of peace, and if you want to understand children better, it is truly worth reading.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8211;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Linkachu<\/em> \u2013 Someone who has battled weight for nearly 20 years and is currently exploring the \u201ceat fully, still lose weight\u201d method.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This is my Facebook! <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/linh.do.984014\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em><strong><mark style=\"background-color:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0)\" class=\"has-inline-color has-vivid-cyan-blue-color\">LinkachuMC<\/mark><\/strong><\/em><\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn c\u00f3 r\u1ea5t nhi\u1ec1u hi\u1ec3u l\u1ea7m v\u1ec1 tr\u1ebb em. C\u00f3 m\u1ed9t \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u00f4i nh\u1eadn ra sau nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c v\u1edbi tr\u1ebb em v\u00e0 ph\u1ee5 huynh: Ng\u01b0\u1eddi l\u1edbn th\u01b0\u1eddng r\u1ea5t y\u00eau tr\u1ebb. Nh\u01b0ng kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00fac n\u00e0o c\u0169ng th\u1eadt s\u1ef1 hi\u1ec3u tr\u1ebb. Ch\u00fang ta l\u1edbn l\u00ean trong m\u1ed9t th\u1eddi k\u1ef3 m\u00e0 c\u1ea3m x\u00fac th\u01b0\u1eddng [&hellip;]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":772,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,10],"tags":[91],"class_list":["post-757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-meo-vat-cuoc-song","category-sach-hay","tag-hieu-lam-ve-tre-em"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/757","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=757"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/757\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":916,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/757\/revisions\/916"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/772"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=757"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=757"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linkachu.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=757"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}